It's Time to Listen

From East Africa

Six months on the other side of the world does wonders for one's perspective. With my wife Chrissy, I've had the privilege of supporting international development projects in Karamoja, Uganda as part of a management fellowship with Samaritan's Purse, a Christian international relief organization. (Read our blog from Uganda for more.) It's 3:30 am on July 20th, and I'm on a bus between Kampala, Uganda and Nairobi, Kenya, setting off on a fun trip around East Africa before returning home to my beloved United States.

I'm tremendously excited to reunite with friends and family as well as settle back in our home state of North Carolina, but as I bump along the Kenyan countryside under the night sky, I'm troubled by expectations of the political rancor I'll step back into, not only in the halls of Congress but in our public squares across America.

Why on Earth am I dwelling on politics at a time like this? My time may be better spent sleeping like my sensible wife whose head keeps falling into my shoulder as I hunt-and-peck away on the iPad. But alas politics is a passion of mine, even in Africa. I spent the last five years working in Washington, DC with some spectacular people who have dedicated their lives to politics, fighting for what they believe in. God bless them. Oh that we all could find vocation in a cause bigger than ourselves which gives our work meaning and purpose.

Indeed I'm a big fan of politics. At its best, I think it's critical, impactful, healthy and fun. Heck I've dedicated a blog to political commentary since 2008 and enjoyed sharing my musings with all of you. As folks know, I'm a Christian, Conservative and Republican, in that order, but all three of those families of mine have disappointed and embarrassed me from time to time.

Too many of my Christian brothers and sisters have gotten in the habit of spewing judgment and condemnation at those with whom they disagree. There's only one problem with this: it's wrong. Terribly, grossly, hypocritically wrong. I could cite umpteen beautiful verses from the Bible to support this point, but the Greatest Commandment seems like a solid choice. "Love your neighbor as yourself." How many times have you looked at a Christian speaking on a political or cultural issue and said “gee that person is filled with love for his fellow man”? Not often, and that's a shame. I'm as sinful and misguided as anybody, but I can read a Greatest Commandment when I see one. The Bible says to remove the plank from your own eye before going off on the speck in someone else's. God help the one of us who forgets that we are all sinners and fall short of the glory of God and decides to hop on our self-righteous soapbox condemning those who are not like us in mind or behavior as if we have standing to judge. We don't.

In the words of our President, "let me be clear." There is right and wrong in this world. I believe there is absolute truth. I personally have strong moral convictions on a host of issues and believe Christians and non-Christians alike should take their convictions into the voting booth without reproach. We call that democracy. What we should not and cannot do if we hope for a healthy prosperous nation is demagogue our American brothers and sisters because they happen to see the world differently, suggesting that not only their opinion but they themselves are less. Such behavior is immature, anti-social and un-American. For Christians you can add hypocritical and destructive to their witness of God's love in Christ.

As for Conservatives and Republicans, vitriol aimed at the other side is both unproductive and self defeating. Politics is not, and never will be, the central battleground between good and evil. If it is then we're all running around thinking we're good while half of our countrymen declare we're evil. Perhaps a little perspective is in order. There are black and white issues, principled issues worth fighting tooth and nail for unyieldingly, but these are the exception not the rule. There is an awful lot of grey area in public policy ripe for negotiation and compro$@!&. (Don't want to offend Washington with profanity. Gotta remember there are kids up there.)

I can hear the retorts and dismissals now. I'm naive. I'm young and idealistic. I'm for appeasement, gasp. As hurtful as those charges are, allow me to brush them off and take a peek at how hyper-polarization is working for us. We're living under the most unproductive and ineffectual Congress in the history of this land with historic sewage level approval ratings to show for it. Enough said.

Today the parties behave like every issue before them is an existential threat and their last stand. This is silly to say the least. The discourse we hear out of Washington is often trivial and pathetic. Our representatives maintain a constant posture of combativeness and defensiveness, often without a shred of camaraderie or good faith. Elections are a competition; legislating should be a more collective and bipartisan effort toward action on behalf of an American people who expect sensible and productive representation. Of course our Liberal and Democratic counterparts are guilty as well but today I'm keeping the tough love in the family.

The United States deserves better... or do we? Unfortunately, rather than looking at our dysfunctional political governing system with the scorn and incredulity that it deserves, many of us dive into the cesspool head first and carry the torch of division and demagoguery to Main Street. We've successfully, and sadly, created a country of warring factions, ever at odds with one another. These pointless and damaging fissures slice along religious, ideological, partisan, racial, gender, sexual orientation, ethnic, educational and socioeconomic lines. If there's a way to slice and dice, we've done it. These many factions are ripping America apart the seams, that country that still considers itself ONE NATION under God. We are disgracing the precious ideals of unity and respect for all. When it takes foreign terrorists slaughtering thousands of our mothers, sons and neighbors to bring us together, something is horribly wrong.

Now, for my humble prescription. Listen. That's it, listen. I borrowed the idea from God 'cuz he's smarter than I am. "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak” -James 1:19.

I'm horrible at this in general because I love to run my mouth (or keyboard, how long is this post now?). But on contentious political and cultural issues, I've always enjoyed and felt a moral responsibility to gain an understanding of the other side's position, rationale and relevant passions. What good is it, indeed what validity has it, to hold fiercely to a position that you've not bothered to weigh or pressure test against disparate perspectives. I find it much more rewarding and fruitful to engage in thoughtful, honest and sober conversations with those who see things differently than I do engaging in a mutual reinforcement party with my friends of like mind. We call that pervasive practice confirmation bias, just think FoxNews, MSNBC and most political websites. Technology has allowed such complete fracturing of the media and information pipeline that most Americans are hearing exactly what they want to hear from people just like them without ever having their ideas questioned or challenged. Not only do we have our own opinions; now we have our own facts. This is dangerous. Confirmation bias has started wars and is today deepening battle lines across America.

What if we turned off our favored news source (after considering why it's our favorite), sat down with someone of a different, fresh perspective, cooled the decimals on overly contentious issues and listened. What if both just sat there humbly and respectfully listening, leaving as much bias and prejudice as humanly possible at the door. Just imagine. Then imagine if your new good practice was adopted on park benches across America, in school cafeterias and yes, even in the halls of Congress. Now that would be a revolution. Many of us would of course still hold different, even competing, views but now we'd be in a position to get beyond slander and look for common ground, each with a newfound appreciation and respect for the other side. Sounds nice doesn't it? Too good to be true? Maybe, but something has to give, and I believe it's possible.

I've had the pleasure of experiencing first-hand the power of lowered voices and humility in facilitating rich discussion on highly impassioned issues over the last several weeks. These included gay marriage in light of the SCOTUS ruling and the Trayvon Martin case. It would be difficult to name more heated issues than these two, and the raging cacophony that is Facebook proves illustrative of that fact. Yet, I was able to channel the heat into an actual dialogue which edified and enriched all involved.

It's too easy for all of us to step up on our high horse and rant until the cows come home, sometimes it's even fun, but it's destructive, and one by one we need to change. We need to stop being defined by what we don't like. Cynicism stinks. It is healthy for no one, certainly not for what has been and should remain the greatest nation on earth, a beacon of hope and example for the world to follow.

Over the past few months, I've lived in a place light years behind and less privileged than America. I've seen people dying of hunger. That is a deeply sobering experience and one that can rock your perspective and reorder your priorities. Life is too short and this world has too many serious challenges for us to remain myopic and self absorbed. Get over it. Open your eyes. Listen.

May we all learn to stop and listen. Our nation depends on it.

The sun is now rising over Nairobi. I'm finally going to sleep.